Love and Hate

Love makes people happy.

Think about someone saying 'I love life' or 'I'd love to have some Mexican food tonight'. Love arouses feelings of happiness.

Beyond the routine of needs, fulfillment, experience, love, understanding, happiness, and rapture make a person feels more whole, alive, self-sufficient, and a part of the world.

Love is the highest goal to which one can aspire to. Viktor Frankl opined that the salvation of man is through love and in love. The Bible states that God is love and out of hope, faith, and love, the greatest is love. Human poetry is almost exclusively about love. The majority of songs are about love.

The Golden Rule sets the template for love. Love all creatures. Don't hate those who hate; otherwise you become like them. I make an effort to live by the Golden Rule, despite my human shortcomings.

Love is simple. It is not as complicated as some make it out to be. Anyone in the world can experience love, regardless of their intellect.

Love can be cultivated. It is possible to make strangers fall in love by sitting face to face, answering a series of increasingly personal questions, and staring silently into each other’s eyes [1].

At present the only person I truly love is my mum. I know I love being with nature and people. Stress and tension disappear when I am with nature and I know it's something I miss when I neglect it. Being with friends was my number one driver of happiness.

Hate, regret, and jealousy are a waste of time and do not bring happiness. Most negative emotions are useless. Resentment, bitterness, hate, and jealousy do not improve the quality of life.

I can see why people may not reply or reject me. Some people get bombarded with messages and I am simply a random person. If I submit to the compulsion of contacting someone who is not interested in me, it only increases the craving to reconnect and fuels a misguided and self-defeating belief that we'll get back together. There is no benefit for me in sending hateful words or harassing them. It is a waste of my time and emotion.

Jealously arises from a lack of self esteem. I have to get my priorities right and control jealous feelings. It's not about getting someone to be with me. It's about looking after myself and putting my happiness first. I have had too many sad times from pursuing sexual desires that were not reciprocated and frustration from a night out. I vow to not let other people affect my happiness.

Open Mind Open Heart

I need to keep an open mind. Be curious about the world and keep learning. Sometimes, I think I know it all or have seen it all. I can be quick to push opinions aside. I am sometimes closed off to events I would have previously being open to. I may be right in my opinion and I don't need to accept every invitation. However, I should be open to possibilities. The truth is that what I know is minuscule.

It is better to make curiosity a habit. Try something new each week. Meet someone new each day. Have conversations to really immerse yourself in other people's lives. A good way to start is asking how people end up where they are. These things help in broadening your experience and perspective as well as adding a bit of fun in the day.

I have also been feeling a cacophony of emotions. Being aware brings light to emotions that I did not know were there. In recent times, I felt melancholy, teariness, tenseness. I am not sad though. Sometimes I cannot identify the source. Mindfulness alleviates these negative emotions. These emotions can quickly flip. I often feel emboldened, motivated, inspired.

I also feel unsatisfied desires and know I need to work hard to make my desires a reality.

Put Happiness First

This is a message to myself.

This is something to think about when I catch myself wondering about 'what next'.

Too many of us are always looking for the next thing. We're looking for whatever comes next. We'd be well served living in the present and living the present the way that brings us the most joy, being present to myself and to others. I have achieved most of the goals I set for myself 5 years ago, but am I happy? No.

Knowing that my life is finite, what do I really want to do with the time that I am alive? Ask this rather than what can I accomplish because everything that can be accomplished is ultimately meaningless.

I know what I value most. Happiness.

I must choose to put my happiness first. I neglected it when I was caught up in work and chasing girls. I am responsible for my happiness and how I respond to events.

I know what makes me happy and sad. I need to do more of what makes me happy. I know that I derive over two-thirds of my happiness from fun and social activities. I know that accumulating wealth does not make me happy. I feel happier when I am less stressed, have something to look forward to, catching up with friends and family, listen to new and old songs, and take time out to consider my values and blog each week.

I know doing what makes me happy won't bring me deep and lasting happiness where I am happy no matter what. This is something I have to cultivate through practicing happiness, not pursuing happiness (re: Joy).

Be grateful that I have the opportunity. That I am financially free. That I am not a refugee in the slums.

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I know I do not enjoy working the positions I have had. I am not following my heart. I keep asking myself: what would you do if money were no object and what job are people happiest in. I am seeking a dream job. A perfect life. However, there is no such thing as a perfect job or a perfect partner. This expectation is not realistic and it is unattainable. The vast majority of people will never find a job that can be an unending source of fulfillment. Although a Gap Year or Food Travel documentary is not bad.

Work or volunteering is good for mental stimulation. I prefer two to three days a week. Travel, leadership, intelligence, online is a bonus.

I know there is no point doing a job for 6 months and then searching another similar job when I return from a holiday.

I know that I enjoy connecting with people (especially attractive women and stimulating people), activities and exploring (walking, exercise, travelling, the environment).

I have to focus on improving my social life and going out with friends. At the same time, I have to remember not to pursue anything in extreme amounts as I may become conditioned to need more to be happy.

The Only Opportunity We Know

As a living human being, we have been given a beautiful opportunity to live. I do not know why we have been given this opportunity. I do not know if we were created or evolved. I simply know that I am here. I exist right now.

I was born a human to [insert names], on planet Earth, in the country known as Australia, in 1985AD.

I do not know if I will ever be given this opportunity again.

If there is something I want to do, it is better to do it now, unless there is a good reason to wait or not to do it.

Time is very brief. I don't know when the music stops. Time is always ticking. I am humble in the knowledge that my life as well as all life on this planet is finite. My time is the most important resource I have because it is finite, whereas something like money is infinite. My life is always ticking closer to the end.

One day the door will close on my life. Nothing I can do will ever bring back time, no matter how hard I try.

Knowing this, I resolve to not over sleep. Live each day to the maximum. Live with a sense of resolve. I only have a brief time on this planet. Life is too short for hate. Life is too short for negativity.

Now is the time to live. I only have so many years. I must live with vigour and joy; and resolve not to be frugal or selfish.

Do what we love while we can. I have lived but not always in the way I want. I have to ask myself how do I see myself living. I have to decide what I want and what I don't want, what I want to be and what journey I am after. The decision will be based on the circumstance I am in and what I know and don't know.

Often we are influenced. It is common for people to define you according to what they think or believe. Often, these are people who are not living their dream, who are not loving life, who are not happy and healthy and well off. The same goes for news articles, media or any source of information we consume as they are likely written by people who are not living the life we want to live.  As such, these people do not have any authority to dictate my life. It is more beneficial to listen to people who are already at where I want to be. External forces may mean well, but they may not be what I want.

I am not right or wrong. There is no right or wrong. It is simply one's perspective. I believe that the only rule is to not seriously harm others. In the end, I am the only one who decides.

Early retirement is not the goal. Living the way I want is.

I have One Life. One God Breathed Life. To make it happen. Am I going to choose to live?

Loss of Hunger

I notice the change. Slowly. I see it in me and my friends.

I don't have that drive. The burning desire to succeed. 

The dulling comes once you achieve success. You have the money, the fame, the power you once craved. You have achieved what you believe to be adequate.

It can also come from age, from being defeated one too many times, from acceptance of your situation, from time devoted to the day to day, from fighting life's battles, from sheer exhaustion.

Energy dampens. You want to relax. To take it easy.

When this occurs, you are gone. The one most universal trait among successful people is hunger.

Never lose the hunger and drive. Be more, give more and create more.

Evolution

The creation of the first living organism with artificial DNA not found in nature is astonishing. As far as we know, this new organism has never occurred in the billions of years of evolution on Earth or elsewhere in the universe.

Life on Earth in all its diversity is encoded by only two pairs of DNA bases, A-T and C-G. What has been created by scientists is an organism that stably contains those two pairs plus a third, unnatural pair of bases.

The discovery opens the door to new possibilities, where infinite permutations of bases can be combined to form infinite numbers of complex amino acids and proteins, potentially leading to an infinite number of organisms and creatures.

This further step in genetic modification, complements recent scientific discussion on artificial intelligence, where machines with superhuman intelligence may reach a stage where they can repeatedly improve their design. This could theoretically give rise to the creation of a new species, beyond which the course of human history is unpredictable or even unfathomable. In fact, it was recently reported that a computer became the first machine to pass the Turing Test by convincing judges that it was human. As Steven Hawking and co wrote, "whereas the short-term impact of AI depends on who controls it, the long-term impact depends on whether it can be controlled at all". These discoveries highlight once again just how little we know.

On a related point, 90 to 99 percent of species ever existing on the planet have already become extinct. The overwhelming majority of species vanish as a result of normal or background extinction due to the limited period of biological species existence, which fluctuates from 1 million years with mammals through to 11 million years with some marine invertebrates. Besides background extinction, fauna has experienced five mass extinctions, as a result of which 50 to 95 percent of then existing species disappeared within a limited historical period.

Perhaps one can take a leaf from the immortal jellyfish, which has the ability to adapt to the environment through transforming itself from an adult to a baby, theoretically meaning that it can live forever.

What Really Matters

I live in a privileged era. I so often forget this. Knowledge, sex, and opportunity are open to me in a way that were not freely available to generations past.

Somehow, despite this, people rarely live up to their dreams. As individuals, we have to stop and ask ourselves 'if I were 80 and looking at my life, what would I have regretted doing and what path I should take now to minimise regret'. Few take the initiative to pursue their calling. Many are too comfortable in their own lives, perhaps with their income and status, and are too scared of stepping outside their boundaries.

I am going to. I, too, am scared of the unknown and am unsure about the uncertainty it entails. However, I have a good idea how happy I will be if I keep following the path I am currently on and what it may be like if I actively pursue what I enjoy.

I know what will happen if I continue on the path that I am on. I see the future ahead of me and it is calamitous. I am already neglecting my friends and social life, ruining my sex life, obsessing over more money, becoming less fit and active, and seeing my happiness levels decline. The average person's happiness declines from their early 20s until 45, in large part due to the toll of working life. I don't see the point of working long hours everyday, wasting away the best years of my life slaving for the system, for something that is pointless anyway. I know that I won't be maximising my happiness if I maintain the status quo.

The big question is whether I can create a life better than I would otherwise. There is only one way to find out. I have to commit to living the way I believe brings me greatest happiness first and reflect on it later (re: Retirement). I have recorded my happiness levels from working and being engaged in other activities. I know which activities I need to pursue to maximise my happiness (re: What Makes Me Happy?).

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Initially I thought life was so much more. I was achievement focused. Then I accomplished most of what I wanted to achieve and I realised that everything there is to accomplish is meaningless in the long run. Almost anything that one can accomplish will not make any lasting impact on history.

Looking through my diaries I see that life just passes by.

It is so quick.

Nothing matters.

I ask myself why I used to fret when it is so insignificant in the end. People pass by. They become a blur. I can't even recall some of my friends.

I am so insignificant. Nothing I do will change anything. The world just keeps going on. The universe keeps going.

Why do something big when it never matters? It doesn't matter because everything eventually fades away.

It's much simpler. It's about happiness, combined with doing good and showing love to others, balancing individuality with cooperation. These virtues line up well with an approach to life seeking to maximise pleasure over the long term as doing good makes life more pleasant and less stressful for the practitioner.